Lunch

Today is Sarah's birthday, and I must admit, my emotions were getting the better of me. Over the last 7 mo, since her passing, I have had so many things to tell her! So many times I have wished I could just call her and tell her my fun, exciting, sad, disappointing news, or anything else that might be going on. I had lunch plans that fell through, and Chet was busy today, but I really wanted to get out of the house, so I kept my sitter and planned to go to the school for lunch. I grabbed some Taco Johns tacos, all the boys favorite, and headed to the school. The twins lunch first, so I was waiting as they arrived in the lunchroom. Carter was in tears. He has not gotten enough sleep and was having a really hard day. I was so happy that I was there to hug him and tell him it was going to be ok. By the end of lunch, he was smiling and laughing. Carson was so proud to have me there. He was so proud to be eating tacos and talked a million miles an hour while we ate. It was fun to be in between my two big 2nd graders eating and talking away. All the boys that I know from their class were coming to sit across from us. Such fun. I know they will not always want me to be there. As they were in line I told Carter to give me a hug and kiss good-bye and he got embarrassed. I said, "Do you want me to hold you down in front of your class and kiss you?" He started laughing and the class was laughing too. Then I went to Carson and he wanted me to do the same thing. They are on that brink. They still want me to hug and kiss them, but they are a little nervous in public. Oh how I love them! Then it was time for Caden's lunch. He cracks Chet and I up as he talks about school. He is so animated and tells us his tall tales like they are fact. Caden was happy to see me and wanted me in the girl line of his class, so I got in the girl line and had his teacher count me in just like any other girl. He loved that. Then he made me sanitize just like him and then said let's go! He was telling the whole table, that was flocking to sit by him (the teacher had to come and move some because they were all cramming in too tight) that Taco Johns is the best place to eat in "all of town" Caden was just talking away, carrying on about 4 conversations. He opened 4 milks as we were sitting there. Everyone just kept handing them to him like he was the official milk opener. He was so kind to everyone, and you could just feel his enthusiasm for life and school oozing out of him. One of his good friends asked me what his (the friends) full name was and I said, "Caden says its Blaze Cool Awesome!" and the whole table bust out laughing. Caden was laughing so hard he could barely sit. He then tells me, "Blaze is so cool AND awesome! That's not his name!" These little kids were just so sweet and fun! It was so fun. He was so proud to have me there, and gave me a huge hug and kiss at the end. To say the least, I miss Sarah SOOOOOOO much. But this was just what the doctor ordered on this day!!! I feel so blessed to have my boys, to know that they love me and appreciate me. It's not very often that I feel that, but today there is no doubt. I. AM. A. MOTHER.!!! And I wouldn't trade them for anything in this world!